A Mind at Home With Itself

By Marcia LeBeau

My brain is always complaining as it crawls toward
                  El Dorado, eyes upturned waiting for a lightning storm 
to stun it speechless. But the sky never claps

open and there is no silence. Its knees bleeding,
                  mouth running, my brain doesn’t hear the alarm go off
in the morning, forgets to cancel its gym membership

even though it stopped going years ago. I have no choice
                  but to ignore my brain. Walk to the other side
of the street when I see it. Stop answering its whiny

voicemails. I have a vision during a massage of my brain
                  glistening like raw hamburger meat on the pavement
below a flashing motel sign. The meat turns

to blue glitter slime the neighborhood kids
                  sell for fifty cents a bag that smells like cotton candy.
I steal a bag because it’s my brain, after all, and toss it

on the kitchen counter. My brain is petrified I’m going
                  to throw it away and begs for mercy. I pick it up, 
slap it on the table, pound it, then ooze it between

my fingers. It feels smooth and cold and reassuring. I knead it 
                  a little longer before I throw it in the trash. My hands
are stained blue, glitter flecks my clothes, but finally, silence.


Marcia LeBeau‘s poems and essays have been published or forthcoming in Painted Bride Quarterly, Moon City Review, Rattle, and elsewhere. She owns The Write Space in Orange, New Jersey, a co-working space for creative writers. 

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