5 things getting attacked by a dog taught me about mid-level B2B sales management
By JB Andre
Featured Art: Stephen Reichert, A List of the Reasons of Why I am Getting Into Computers, 2025. Oil pastel, pen and marker on paper, 14″ x 11″.
First I want to start off by saying that I am OK. An ambulance ride, eight stitches, and a lot of painkillers later, I am safely at home with my beautiful, loving family. Shoutout my amazing wife @CamillaSpringer for taking such good care of me after my hospital stay. I also want to take this time to share my gratitude with friends and family who have reached out to wish me a safe recovery—and to those who haven’t: it’s not too late! I have decided to post about this following the success of my more personal article: “What I learned about leadership when my Grandmother died.” To all of my readers, again I thank you for your well-wishes. Please don’t forget to like, share, re-post, and comment. Follow me if you don’t already for more great business content!
Yesterday morning, I was walking my labradoodle puppy (say hi Max!), or, I suppose, we were coming back from a trip to the park, and crossing the parking lot to our apartment (for those of you shocked that we still live in an apartment, check out my article “The risks of homeownership for early-career entrepreneurs”). About halfway across the parking lot, I saw a nasty-looking dog. About 70, 80 pounds, brown, a mutt with a broad, square face like something between a pit and a shepherd, but low to the ground and stocky. I recognized this dog and knew it was trouble (check out my post “Max got attacked by a dog but he’s OK: Resources on pet care and picking an affordable veterinarian”). It was walking up to us slowly, but I have to admit—I ran! Which brings me to my first of five tips.
- Persistence is Key.
When that dog locked eyes on me, it didn’t give up, no matter how fast I ran. Even when it got to me, I tried to keep it away from Max by giving a solid kick in the ribs, but that’s when the dog clamped down on my leg. I wasn’t sure what was happening at first, and then I saw the blood running down my leg and filling up my shoe and all along the sidewalk in a big, sticky, puddle. I felt a terrible pressure against my shin. I managed to scruff the dog, but it wouldn’t let go, and I was so scared that if I let go it would turn and snap his jaws on my hand or my arm, and I wasn’t about to try to punch it, so I held onto it while it held onto my leg. And the whole while the dog wasn’t giving up.
Sometimes you have to meet persistence with persistence, and the first one to let go was going to lose. My fingers were so tight, I had never held anything so hard before—I could feel the tip of each finger against the palm of my hand through the dog’s skin and fur. And remember, (another, bonus tip) communication is key. The whole time I was screaming “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog,” “come get your dog.”
Hard to miss a message like that—and it worked! Soon enough, or maybe a minute or five minutes it was hard to tell (check out my article, “Punctuality Shmunctuality—Letting go of time in game time decisions”) the dog’s owner came and got his dog and asked to help and I said some things that I won’t repeat here, but he left with his dog and—unbelievably—he seemed more worried about his dog than he was about me.
Now, when you’re in sales, you’re either the dog or the person getting bit. What matters is persistence and communication, because the one who doesn’t give up wins out in the end. When you’ve sniffed out a client or a sale, you need to clamp down on it, and don’t give up until you’ve got it or you have to get dragged away. If that dog were one of my sales associates, I’d be giving it a raise!
2. Know your blind spots
So, there I was, staggering around, my poor Max had run away, and some neighbors were starting to come out to see what had happened. What a sight they must have come out to! My left foot was sloshing around the blood in my shoe, and I was leaving a mess everywhere. (Brief sidebar—I was so impressed when I came home from the hospital and could only see the faintest shadow of what happened to me on the sidewalk. Whatever they used to clean up they did a great job—check out this awesome article from my roommate from UPenn: “Pressure washers—Buying, renting, or hiring a pro.”) And as I was hobbling around a neighbor noticed that I was looking really very pale, and told me to lie down. Now, I would never have thought of this on my own—I was so focused on my next goal—getting help—that I didn’t even recognize that my neighbors were there to help! Sometimes in sales and management, you don’t know what you don’t know. Keep your eyes and ears open to everyone—the best advice can come from those who aren’t pros.
3. Delegate, but not too much
Once I was on the ground, my neighbors asked me what they should do. Two people were helping me, an older white woman with short silvery hair, and a younger Hispanic man wearing a “got milk?” T shirt featuring some athletic woman. He had a thick beard and looked like a real go-getter. I told the older woman to call 911, to which she replied “I have to go get my phone,” and ran to her apartment. At that point I realized “by gosh I have my phone right here!” Instead of waiting for the woman to get back, I called 911 myself, and was much more effective at the job, since I already knew my name, birthday, and what had happened. I had to use my delegation skills to understand what tasks were simple, two-minute tasks (check my page to see where I reposted the article: “Stop Procrastinating: How to use the two-minute rule for increased productivity”), and what tasks were more complicated, outside my control. Not everyone can put out a house fire, stop a crime, or bind a leg that is leaking—absolutely leaking everywhere—but anyone can take two minutes to call 911, and get help from the experts.
I made a mental inventory—what did I have? My phone, my wallet, my keys. What was I missing? Medical help, and Max. At about this time Animal Control arrived, and I so dreaded that they might find Max, my terrified Max, and mistake him for the aggressor. And I was not sure how Animal Control normally approached vicious dogs but I imagined long poles with a choking wire loop, tazers, tranquilizers. Guns. So I shouted to the Animal Control van “Not Max! He ran that way.” (I pointed.) “He’s my dog. He’s good.” I realized I couldn’t very well find Max in my state, and so I told the entrepreneurial-looking young Hispanic if he could please find Max, who just then peeked his head out from around the corner of the apartment complex, and was ambling towards us, leash in tow. I remember thinking for a second how low to the ground he was, how he strolled towards us just like the bad dog had, and I wondered if Max liked the smell of blood. But he came and I pushed the thought from my mind and gave my keys to the young man and hoped that he would not steal or move anything. My fantastic wife had optimized the strategic furniture placement, color psychology, and positive symbolism of our home, and I was afraid he might leave something out of balance and upset my wife (check out my article: “Feng Shui at home, Feng Shui at work: how our workspace affects our mindspace, featuring @CamillaSpringer”).
At this point, the cold settled in and I began shaking tremendously. I also realized that in taking the ambulance to the hospital, I would miss my chance to enter in the time off I would need. So, confronting my final two-minute task, I called my boss to let her know I wouldn’t be in the office and upon receiving her voicemail called my boss’s boss to let her know the same thing. I then left voicemails for my mother, and father, and my beautiful wife somewhere in that mix as well. In the end, my time was logged correctly, my dog was retrieved, and the proper authorities were alerted, all because I had managed to delegate effectively. This comes up time and time again in sales, especially when managing a team. Understanding which tasks are in your control, which would be an inconvenience for you to take on, and which tasks are outside of your expertise is key to making effective use of your time and your team’s.
4. Getting the Most out of Expendable Assets
When the fire department came, they wrapped my leg and asked a number of questions about my health, my height and weight (check out my article: “Conveying confidence in sales as a Short King”), and many other things like whether I was allergic to anything (check out a post from my brother-in-law, @JohnathanSpringer, VP of our people team here at Guardian Business Solutions: “Planning a company party in today’s gluten-free, meat-free, fun-free diet culture” [and I am proud to say that it was my very own request for a gluten-free birthday cake that inspired his article!]).
I faced a number of choices about other items I would or would-not have to discard. My phone, keys (kindly returned by the Hispanic neighbor), and wallet were untouched, and thus my most important assets were safe. But my shoe was ruined, and in order to properly bind my leg, the multitude of uniformed bodies that were slowly crowding my vision wanted to cut my pant leg. There was no way around it, and I will have to buy a new pair of trusty Wednesday slacks. However, upon failing to find a vein in my hand for an IV (I had lost a bit of blood, and was later informed that my veins had “deflated”), the uniforms wanted to cut the sleeve of my blazer to access a better vein. But here I told them that no, this blazer was a special polyester, cotton, spandex blend that doesn’t look like athleisure but provides the same comfort and stretch (Check out my article, “Brands you can wear to a performance review and to the gym right after,” and while you’re at it follow it up with my article “7 best gym classes for networking”). The uniforms discovered that yes this was true, and rolled my blazer sleeve up past my elbow with relative ease. One of them shouted “Got it!”
Throughout this process, I had to assess which assets of mine were expendable, and should be protected. Having a better idea of which assets have played out their use (my pant leg, my shoe), and which assets can be repurposed or used despite damage (my blood-soaked blazer), is a critical way to reduce costs. Does the printer really need new ink, or can you stretch it out a little longer? Has your new hire really met and exceeded expectations, or will they be satisfied with a “standard performance” end‐of‐year bonus? These questions should always be going through your mind no matter what situation or office culture you’re facing.
5. Picking a team you can sleep with
I know! I know! It’s not what you’re thinking. No I do not mean the inappropriate “sleeping with” (though you should check out my articles, “Office romance: do’s and don’ts,” and “Signing a pre-nup when you marry a VP”). Rather I am talking about having a team that you can feel confident will handle any situation whether you are awake and manning the ship, or fast asleep. Granted, I did not fall asleep during the course of my care—despite the blood loss and a non-negligible dose of medical grade fentanyl I was wide awake for the ambulance ride with a rather large EMT who was a terrible conversationalist, and wide awake as a petite blonde nurse with tattoos of playing cards and colorful flowers (check out my post, “Tattoos in the workplace—cool or unprofessional?”) closed my wound with eight perfect sutures (I assume they were perfect, though I did not watch, as I was busy looking away and asking the nurse whether anyone had been able to contact my wife, who, I later learned, was very busy leading a board meeting). I was awake for the bite report with animal control, where they assured me that the bad dog was caught and that it would be put down after a ten-day quarantine. And I was awake to wonder, to hope, to pray, that Max was OK because while he looked OK no one had actually checked to see if he had been bitten too before he was pulled up the stairs and locked away in the apartment.
But when I arrived home, I could relax, because the team I had worked with, my care providers, the authorities, my family and friends, had taken such good care of me that I could relax, and Max was OK too. And later at night, when my wife, my beautiful, executive VP wife, arrived at home, she told me to stay in bed for dinner and when I used one of her favorite pillows, covered in a spare towel (another expendable asset!), to prop my leg up as it shed a slow drip of red tears, she kindly brought me a pillow from the couch and said to use that one instead. And Max was fed, and dinner was made, and at night I told Max I loved him and I was proud of him but he would have to sleep in his crate because we couldn’t risk him jumping on the bed and tearing my stitches.
In bed my wife asked what happened to the other dog, and I said it got taken away, and she asked if the dog was going to be put down. I told her it would. She called the dog a poor baby and wondered out loud if the owner had other dogs, if that dog had had brothers or sisters, what kind of life it had left.
I asked her what she thought that brief moment had been like for the dog, running out and tearing at the first thing it saw. Had he always wanted to attack? Was that a taste of freedom?
My wife said how grateful she was that Max was OK, that he was her life and she wouldn’t know what to do without him, and when Max heard his name he pawed at the door to his crate and cried and I could just see the white pearl of his canines and remembered the clamp, the blood, and though I never looked at the bad dog’s face after the bite, I imagined it, glistening, mud-red, wet, satisfied.
I asked my dear lovely wife if she would mind if Max slept in the crate until I was healed, and she asked how long that would be.
I said I didn’t know.
She asked if I should then sleep on the couch, and she could sleep with Max.
Which goes to show the power (bringing it back to tip 2!) of knowing your blind spots. The best ideas come from spontaneous brainstorming—I would never have thought of that idea by myself!
I slept on the couch. Because that is the benefit of choosing the right team. I rested well that night, not just because of my family team, but especially knowing that my team at work had been perfectly capable of carrying on without me for a day. And you my most cherished readers, I rested for you, so I could write this article and read your well-wishes. Today I am taking a half day to delegate my tasks (spot tip number 3!), and lo and behold, the office is still in order. I will take the weekend off, and should be back in the office Monday.
I have never felt so excited and prepared to get back to work.
JB Andre holds a bachelor’s in neuroscience, a teaching degree, and is currently pursuing his MFA in fiction at the Warren Wilson Program for Writers. He works as an admissions counselor and lives in Roswell, New Mexico, where his partner is studying medicine. His work is forthcoming and published in Propagule, The Account, 101 Words, Uncharted, and anthologized in the upcoming Red Mare Collection.
Stephen Reichert (American, b. 1975), Baltimore City, Maryland, is a multidisciplinary artist with recent solo shows at Hancock Solar Gallery, Co_Lab, Baltimore City Hall, and Sotheby’s Roland Park Gallery; a current show at The Fox Building; and group shows at Ellington-White Contemporary, The Peale Museum, American Visionary Art Museum, Arts Fort Worth, University of Maryland, National Art League, Cerulean Arts Gallery, Abington Art Center, Sebastopol Center for the Arts and many others. He is the editor of the poetry magazine Smartish Pace. Reichert is represented by K. Hamill Fine Art & Design.
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