By Leigh K. Sugar

my co-fellow leading the free veterans writing workshop—
                    a fiction writer—
had been to prison
                    for killing a guy.

It was accidental.
                    College,
                                        a party,
                                                            alcohol,
                                                                                a gun.

The dead guy’s parents
                    didn’t even want him in court
(him being my co-fellow).
                    It was all a terrible mistake.

He’s white, the fiction writer,
                    and was writing a book about a man who kills his brother
and goes to prison.

What I took away from the book,
                    which he showed me in draft form,
is not shocking. There’s guilt, then dread,
                    then guilt again, then, somehow, life

but never the same.
                    The veterans in the workshop never talked
about if, or who, or what
                    they’d killed
except a rogue navy guy who wouldn’t (couldn’t?) stop
                    reliving the glory days of the Gulf. Otherwise,
they didn’t tell
                    and we didn’t ask.

My co-fellow had been a college student.
                    It was an accident; young dudes, a party,
alcohol, a gun. He’s white. It was Maine.
                    The dead boy’s parents didn’t even want prison.

He got a year and taught guys inside how to write.
                    He told me it was frustrating, the guys
who were illiterate. They were all white
                    and couldn’t get high. After, he did manual labor—
construction?—for a few years
                    then came to New York.

He was very handsome, and later
                    we didn’t-but-almost kissed
after I’d come home from 2 months
                    in the psych ward.

He knew where I’d been
                    and told me I looked great,
which I knew,
                    but he had a girlfriend,
which I didn’t.

                    Psych patients,
wards, and prisons alike love puzzles—soft
                    harmless pieces dumped
on the floor, the table, guaranteed
                    to fit together, already
perfect, the answer already known
                    to exist—

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Leigh Sugar lives in Michigan. Her debut poetry collection FREELAND is forthcoming from Alice James Books in 2025. She holds an MFA from NYU and an MPA in Criminal Justice Policy from John Jay College. She has taught at CUNY’s Institute for Justice and Opportunity, NYU, Poetry Foundation, Hugo House, Justice Arts Coalition, and various prisons in Michigan. Poems appear or are forthcoming in POETRY, Split This Rock, jubilat, and more. In addition to FREELAND, she edited the anthology That’s a Pretty Thing to Call It: Prose and poetry by artists teaching in carceral institutions (New Village Press, 2023). Leigh works for Rachel Zucker on the poetry podcast Commonplace. Learn more and say hi at leighksugar.com or on Instagram @lekasugar.